my inheritance

i think a lot about taking some of those pills that make you lose weight supposedly, but a bottle of them is like twenty bucks and they probably don't work. i am too unmotivated to maintain any sort of exercise routine. but my legs are atrophying and my belly is bloating. too much caffeine not enough water.

you don't care. you don't want to hear it.

i'm tired.

bored/boring.

repellent.

i really do feel disinterested in most things. i think pretty much almost everything, i really lack an interest in. which pretty much sucks.
i'm effing DEPRESSED.
can't shake it!
always seems like i'm swimming as hard as i can muster but still only treading water.

and i do want to be rescued.
but mostly i don't want anything.
except to feel interested in something. in doing something.
THIS SUCKS.
and there is basically nothing anyone can do to help me.